Richard Zowie's Blog: A little humor now and then

Saturday, September 22, 2007

A little humor now and then

My stars! Who in blazes let THIS weirdo put his picture on my blog?

This was me taken from a few months ago. I think I took it, but it may have been my wife, Jennifer.

Wow, look at the size of that schnoz. Michael Jackson, please tell your cosmetic surgeon to STOP CALLING ME!!! My nose is not for sale!

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Frequently Asked Questions

Is Zowie really your real name? Yes.

You're kidding, right? No.

How do you pronounce it? Rhymes with these words: wowie, Howie (as in Howie Mandel) and Maui.

Where did it come from? The Zowie family originated in Germany (Bavaria, to be specific). My grandfather's birthname was Sylvester Sebastian Zahnweh (pronounced "Tsahn-veh" and means "Toothache" in German), and a few years later his name was Americanized. He became Sebastian Paul Zowie.

When did you become a Christian? October 1981, reassurance of salvation April 1984.

You seem to be a quirky person with a bizarre sense of humor. Why? I suffer from a desire to keep myself constantly occupied and entertained. If I'm not writing or working on something that has to be done, then I say or do goofy things. Primarily, they're designed to make me laugh, but as I get older, I think I'm getting better at making others laugh. Still, considering the garbage that many Americans think is funny today (Knocked Up, for example), I tend to roll my eyes when people tell me my jokes aren't working.

Who are your favorite authors to read? Ray Bradbury, Harry Turtledove, Stephen King, Frank Peretti. Michael Crichton. Haven't read Ted Dekker yet, but I'm told he's very good.

Do you ever receive e-mail from readers? Sometimes. I received some very positive e-mails after a column about my cousin's death by a drunk driver was published. Another drunk driving column about a horribly-disfigured young lady resulted in an angry e-mail from a Wynonna Judd fan (I'd mentioned her since she'd been arrested on a DUI). And then, Imdb comments of mine about the loathsome show Seinfeld resulted in this kid writing me a very angry letter. I feel sorry for him and from the fan.

If you ever became famous, do you think you and your family would ever do a reality television show? Absolutely not.

Ok, so what are your favorite Papermate pens? Yes.

Seriously, what are your favorite all-time Papermates? Probably Pro-fit or Comfortmate.

Whom will you be voting for in November? Not Barack Obama!

Richard Zowie's resume

RICHARD ZOWIE
(989) 871-2070
richardzowie@gmail.com

OBJECTIVE
To work in the publishing, print or radio media, using the experience to further myself professionally as a journalist, columnist and eventually as an author.

SUMMARY
Several years of experience in teamwork and completing crucial tasks in a fast-paced environment. Articles have been appeared in many publications and in Air Force news services. Strong knowledge of Microsoft Word and a working knowledge of Quark and Adobe Photoshop. Can type 77 w.p.m.

WORK EXPERIENCE
2000 – Now: Journalist and columnist. Currently work as a freelance news and features writer and photographer for the Flint Journal Community Newspapers, including the Clio Messenger, Flushing Observer and Davison Flagstaff. Have also written news, feature, sports and editorials and have taken photographs for several Texas and Michigan publications including the (Lapeer) County Press, San Antonio Express-News and San Antonio-based Prime Time Newspapers. Two columns written: “Richard’s Ramblings”, a column featuring commentary on political, social, current events, sports, humor and the enigmatic appears regularly in the Beeville Bee-Picayune. Religious commentary column “My Two Shekels” has appeared in the San Antonio Christian Beacon and currently appears in the (Redford, Mich.) Olive Branch Press and Saworship.com.

June 2000 – June 2007: Broadcaster. Have worked at Gospel 1230 WMPC, Lapeer, Mich. and in San Antonio at News Talk 550 KTSA, AM 630 KSLR and AM 930 KLUP. Duties have included running a control board, disk jockeying, recording news broadcasts, playing programs, making on-air announcements, call screening and guest hosting live talk shows.

June 30, 2003 – Nov. 18, 2003: Production analyst, Welder Exploration and Production, Inc. Responsible for maintaining paperwork on well files along with filing daily, weekly and monthly reports for various oil and gas wells across south Texas.

1996 – 2000: Russian language voice interceptor, United States Army, San Antonio, TX. Cleared for top secret information and granted access to sensitive compartmented information by the Department of Defense, based on a single scope background investigation. Two feature articles published in Globe magazine, the official publication of Defense Language Institute in Presidio of Monterey, Calif. Military service contract ended on February 21, 2000.

AWARDS
Michigan Associated Press – Top Contribution, Dec. 2006, Story of man charged in triple murder; Honorable Mention, April 2007, Story of girl who made dress out of dum dum candy wrappers. Honorable Mention, May 2007, Story of man being convicted of triple murder.

EDUCATION
1998: Diploma, Electronic Voice Interceptor School, Goodfellow AFB, San Angelo, TX.

1998: Diploma, Russian Basic Course, Defense Language Institute, Presidio of Monterey, CA.

1995: B.A., History (with an English minor), Pensacola Christian College, Pensacola, FL.

REFERENCES
Available upon request.

Richard Zowie's Blog

Saturday, September 22, 2007

A little humor now and then

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