Back in 1996 while stationed in the Army at the Presidio of Monterey, Calif.'s Defense Language Institute, I got my first taste of the tasteless filmmaker Kevin Smith. A friend had rented Clerks. It's a brilliant film about a convenience store worker, I was told.
Fifteen minutes later, I got up and left. The movie was incredibly boring and had enough profanity and vulgarity to fill several films.
A month or so later, I sat down and watched about half an hour of Mallrats. Same result: boring, disgusting film.
I haven't seen Clerks II or Dogma, since I feel you don't have to repeatedly whiff a pile of garbage to know it smells bad. So, it goes without saying that I won't be seeing his new film, either.
Smith, according to the AP, recently--at a comic book convention--featured a clip of his new film Zack and Miri Make a Porno. (The movie stars Seth Rogen of Knocked Up, which tells me this movie will be utterly unwatchable). Smith also mentions having a hearing to get the film an R rating: currently, the Motion Picture Association of America has rated it NC-17 despite Smith's numerous edits.
No worries, Kevin: just make it R-rated and then feature your cut on the DVD.
I love to laugh, don't get me wrong, but why does the world insist on trying to get humor from smut instead of getting humor from irony, off-the-wall scenarios and great timing?
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